Don't Party Too Hard Without Me!

Dear Family

Don't party too hard with out me and send me some cake! Sarah is whooping you all on the package department! I hope you all get out on the dance floor with your freshest moves for me-seeing dancing isn't allowed as a missionary haha. This past week went by so fast and I have never learned more in my entire life! Seriously, the MTC is like living in the Temple because you just feel the Spirit so easily here it's impossible not to learn a ton each day. Rather than going through each day of the week I'll just give you some of my highlights.

So at the MTC as an english missionary you pretty much are teaching investigators the whole time, role-playing teaching, or learning teaching skills-all of the gospel knowledge has to come from personal study or personal time at night. Side note before I get in to talking about our investigators, the Gospel makes the most sense when you relate it back to the missionary purpose. Literally everything in the scriptures and everything prophets have said are so clear when you can tie it back to the purpose.

We've been discussing a ton about how to make an environment wherein the Spirit can reside rather than simply using logic when teaching. Man cannot be reasoned to heaven. 

In the MTC we teach in a place called TRC (heck if I knew what this acronym stands for) where we teach real live people about the gospel. We're teaching this girl named Rebekah who is Jewish and is curious about the church from a friend. She's very receptive, but obviously because she's jewish she has a hard time accepting that the atonement really did happen and that Christ really is her savior. So Elder Allsop and I broke it down to her (no we're not rappers) using her profession, a dental hygienist. I explained that when we get plaque on our teeth we are then subject to cavities which make our mouths hurt and are no fun. Then when we go to get our teeth cleaned we remove that plaque and don't have to worry about cavities. Elder Allsop continued with how to prevent more cavities we brush our teeth to have clean mouths. This is like the atonement because as we sin we are unclean and are subject to dying forever condemned to our sins. We then must go to a dental hygienist-Christ-who will clean our mouths so that we don't die in wickedness. However, to convert ourselves unto Christ and live as he did we must brush our teeth everyday to prevent plaque or sin. It. was. a. slam. dunk. Also in TRC there are cameras in the rooms so that our teachers can evaluate us and watch how we're doing. I could hear Brother Jibson (he's a trainer for all the teachers in our floor) and some other teachers scream out in joy. It's like they're watching Monday night football or something haha.

Overall at the MTC the missionary purpose has really helped me uncover why I'm going to Nova Scotia. At the end of the fireside sunday night Sister Nally-President Nally's wife-was giving a talk and then invited up some missionaries to bear their testimonies. Except rather than do it in English some missionaries did it in Danish or Korean or French. I felt so mad and frustrated rather than feel the spirit from their words. I thought Sister Nally 'what freaking gives?!' 'that should have been me!' and I continued to be mad and lost as the meeting concluded and I walked past all these missionaries with characters on their tags and mine is only in English. It didn't help earlier where I received a letter which asked me to fill out a survey about 'how I'm doing mentally' online. I felt so pathetic all that Sunday afternoon and was frustrated when some of the elders in my zone got similar letters. I was frustrated that I thought Dr. Hogg's letter that we sent with my papers cleared that stuff up. I thought what the heck is the problem here-I have been batched with all the people that had mental problems or even the thought came to my mind 'Do I not have enough of a testimony or teaching skills to learn a new tongue?' It made me so lost and I thought I was condemned to be cold and bored for the next two years.

Oh how blind I have been towards the purpose of missionary work. After the meeting we proceeded out the doors for films. We wanted to go see the Restoration film, but as we stood in the crammed room sweating and tired from the day, we made our way back to the main room where Elder Bednar's MTC Christmas Devotional from a few years back was playing. I walked in, slammed my books on the ground, rolled up my sleeves, and wanted to cry myself to sleep. Slowly as Elder Bednar began his talk-The Character of Christ-I fell open to understanding. He relayed how missionary work has nothing to do with who we are or what we want. This work is about being Christlike and turning outward to our fellow man. It is about love and service and about charity. This work isn't for me and nothing is about me. He then relayed what will be my most spiritual experience in the MTC. He told of Christ being tempted by Satan to make bread because he was an hungered and had the power to do so. But he would have had to deny himself-who he was. Suddenly it came so clear what my call is all about. Yes, I have the capabilities to learn a hard language-just as Christ has the power to create bread-but this mission is so I can become like Christ-fast from my own desires and turn more to Christ and SERVE OTHERS. As if God himself were speaking to me, Elder Bednar continued with how every single mission call goes through the ends of an apostle and places are carefully selected. Like being hit by a spiritual bus. This mission isn't about me, it's about becoming converted to Christ and being like him. After that talk-because similar bad feelings had been in my district-we all were so excited to serve! We ran back to our dorms and were jumping up and down like it was Christmas or something. Elder Walker screamed "AHHHHH IT'S SO TRUE!!!!!" Becoming converted to Christ is the only thing that will make us happy in this life. God simply wants me to be more like his Son like he wants for all of us. I promise that that's true. Look up that talk btw! I think he gave it at BYU-I

Some words for our two lovebirds ;) I know absolutely nothing about marriage, but I have been learning a lot about the atonement and especially with the temple this morning it's coming clear into focus. Our whole district has pondered 'why would an innocent third-party have to suffer for a guilty and unclean party?' On the surface level this question is answered simply, but I've learned a ton about it that I'd like to share. There are two eternal laws-The Law of Justice and the law of mercy. Both seem to contradict one another, but through the atonement they make sense. In Alma 42 it refers to Justice as a 'him' and Mercy as a 'her.' This brought me to think of how there is opposition in all things. Although there is opposition in all things that doesn't mean 'things' are fighting eachother-they're helping eachother. The atonement satisfied both laws because Christ loves us. Why he loves us I'm still searching and learning for. But at times you may feel like the universe is working against you, but no, it's trying to help you. So remember that as man and woman may be 'opposite' so to speak, they are meant to be together to help one another. So proud of you guys!!!

Well that's about all I got. We leave tuesday at 5am for Detroit and then onto Halifax. We have a long layover in Detroit so I'll call then around 2pm Detroit time. Be on the phone please!!!

I love you all and I miss you!!!

Halifax in the suburbs